Typical of this sort of horizontal integration, the announcement washed ashore covered in a thick coat of marketing-speak sludge:
"Traditionally, thinking and doing have been very separate entities in advertising. It's that separation that creates wasted time and missed opportunities," said goodness Mfg. executive creative director, Tom Adams. "With goodness Mfg. joining Trailer Park, it enables collaboration much earlier in the process. As a result, we get creative alignment sooner--ensuring the work goes to market faster. This is especially critical as communications evolve into hundreds of micro-interactions, not just one big campaign."
Trailer Park CEO Rick Eiserman added, "As marketers look to new partners to ensure their brand communications are keeping pace with increasingly demanding consumers and an evolving media landscape, Trailer Park and goodness Mfg. are really well situated. Our ability to provide unparalleled creative and production capabilities, without all the inefficiencies of an old world model, is a game-changer."
If you’re like us, your design philosophy is to capture an emotional response from the viewer through a dizzying array of design elements or through a single iconic image or through whatever piece of crap you can get your client to sign off on before the weekend. Which is why we saw ourselves mirrored so exactly in our latest Mystery Mission Statement Agency:
----- is a visual solutions provider to entertainment and corporate based markets. (sure, it sounds poncy, but it takes a real guts to call yourself a “visual solutions provider” with a straight face) We employ throughout our company a staff of highly talented, highly motivated individuals whose sole mission is to develop arresting and unique design options, through imagination, innovation and creativity. (anyone developing design options through any other means, such as scrolling through impawards, looking at photographer’s websites or flipping through fashion magazines will be swiftly terminated)
At -----, uniqueness is our specialty. (in fact, uniqueness is so pervasive it’s downright commonplace) We are always looking for new and innovative ways to push the design envelope, (we need to push the envelope in order to fit our big, fat invoices in it) bringing unexpected solutions to set each design apart. (if that doesn’t work, we mount them on foamcor with a 4” margin all around) Our design philosophy is to capture an emotional response from the viewer through a vast array of design elements or through a single iconic image.
Customer service is our top priority. (riiiiight. just ask any of our art directors) We strive to deliver the highest quality product in accordance with the needs of our clients by adapting to an ever-changing schedule. (our client needs it by Thursday so they can send it back for total revisions on Friday to be made by Monday when they get back from Palm Springs)
The team at ----- has provided visual design solutions (like we said: we’re a “visual design solutions provider”, you got a visual design problem with that, mister?) to many top domestic and international companies, who entrust us with taking their product to new heights in design making it different from anything else in the marketplace. (but not so different that it can’t be instantly identified as just one more entertainment product in the marketplace)
Our extensive portfolio illustrates our vast knowledge and experience and demonstrates why we are the premiere choice for creative design. (or, as we like to call it, graphic iconography conceptualization and development)
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If you're like us, you judge an agency is not by the quality of their work, but by the quantity of words they use to describe their work. Which is why we take special delight in this novella-length Mystery Mission Statement:
---- is fuel for marketing. What does that mean, exactly? (well, to be exactly exact it doesn't mean anything, but allow us, if you will, a little poetic license... not to be confused with Poetic Justice, that bygone ad boutique of the 90s) For the past 5 years through the use of print, television, online and viral initiatives, ---- has launched hundreds of mini-brands. (discreet enough to wear every day, mini-brands are ideal for those light flow days.) These mini-brands are movies, video games and consumer products targeted at the 18-35 year old consumer. (or any one else in a state of arrested adolescence with an extra $50 or $60 to spend)
But even we, who have dedicated our lives to this pursuit, cannot keep track of all the shops that come and go in this crazy biz called show. You can't swing a cat without hitting a designery boutique around here these days, although it remains to be seen how many will remain to be seen by the end of 2009.
So see if you can guess which one of the billions and billions of entertainment advertising agencies out there is home to our latest Mystery Mission Statement:
If you’re like us, your head is such a big, old bag of puffed up affectations and self-importance that you can barely lift it off your pillow each morning. Which is why we were so thrilled when we went looking for this month’s Mystery Mission Statement and came upon this agency's superbly pretentious website.
If you’re like us, you subscribe to the Lone Penman Theory. That’s the name given to the conclusion reached by many of us that there is a lone copywriter responsible for the “About Us” page on each of the various agencies’ websites.
How else can you explain that each of the award-winning full service design agency manifestos are virtually indistinguishable from all of the other award-winning full service design agency manifestos?
Case in point is this week’s Mystery Mission Statement:
If you’re like us, the only thing standing between you and a life of total self-absorption is the constant, whining demands of your clients. So imagine if you will, the intoxicating spirit of fellowship we felt upon seeing the phrase “client-centric” jump out at us in this week’s Mystery Mission Statement:
If you’re like us, you judge your rivals’ creativity not by their portfolio, but by their use of a second color on the “ABOUT US” page on their web site.
See if you can guess the identity (and the favorite PMS color) of this week’s Mystery Mission Statement:
See if you can stay awake long enough to guess the identity of this week’s Mystery Mission Statement:
If you’re like us, you toil passionately, tirelessly and, above all, uncomplainingly to deliver inspired, innovative work to your grateful clients and, like us, you recognize a kindred spirit when you see one.