Another Mystery Mission Statement Accomplished

If you’re like us, you have nothing better to do all day than troll the Internets looking for agencies’ "About Us" pages to make sport of. 

But even we, who have dedicated our lives to this pursuit, cannot keep track of all the shops that come and go in this crazy biz called show. You can't swing a cat without hitting a designery boutique around here these days, although it remains to be seen how many will remain to be seen by the end of 2009.

So see if you can guess which one of the billions and billions of entertainment advertising agencies out there is home to our latest Mystery Mission Statement: 

----- is a team of seasoned professionals, including former studio executives (whoa! Where did you ever find any of them in this town?!!) and creative directors that are here and ready to meet your every need.

Our hand picked, highly talented team (unlike machine picked teams you find at other agencies) specializes in the creation of print campaigns for Feature Films, Network Television, Cable, Home Entertainment as well as the Independent Market. While working with ----- you can always count on a fresh approach to each project. We work timelessly (note to self: we’ve got to get a system in place for tracking hours spent on jobs) to ensure that your project is done to the highest standard each time it leaves our studio (and comes back again and again and again for revisions). ----- will get to know your target market and learn to speak their language (unless, of course, they speak Portuguese, which would be a total waste of our time). Our team works hard to make your life easier by becoming your partner in every way (except, of course, sexually, which would be a total waste of your time).

----- demands excellence in everything that we do and will do whatever it takes to keep our promises to the client. We possess an uncanny ability to track the smallest details while keeping an eye on the big picture, you, which makes us invaluable, strategically and tactically (especially if you’re the type of self-absorbed jackass client who actually thinks that you're the big picture).

We look forward to being a part of your team.

Give up? Click here.

Comments

[Shoes4Industry]

"specializes in the creation of print campaigns for Feature Films, Network Television, Cable, Home Entertainment as well as the Independent Market."

Plus, for a limited time only, we're offering a Rock Bottom, Blow 'Em Out The Doors - Special Sale on INITIAL CAPS!*

*available only while supply last.

[Les Morizless]

But Wait, if you act now, we'll throw in a month's supply of SHAMWOW!

[More Anon Than Anon]

I think they meant "work tirelessly."
But they probably outsourced their proofreader.

[Shoes4Indstry]

The copywriter was probably just tired from working "timelessly"...

http://tinyurl.com/cj7er9